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Friday, July 5, 2013

Sweatshop Sangria

It's summer and we were heading to my brother’s place for BBQ.  I had been hankering for fruit, which translates into “let’s make sangria” in my mind.  Last year, AG had a simple yet delicious sangria recipe.  Since I’m notoriously awful in the kitchen, I figure, let’s go with something easy, tried and true.  But since I was making this for 6 people (and we’re all drinkers in my family), I decided to triple up on the recipe.

I chopped up some peaches and strawberries.  I started off with one of those little plastic boxes of strawberries, and 4 large white peaches.  Most of them made it into the pitcher.  Excellent!  I think I was extremely smart in cutting up the fruit BEFORE the drinking…errr…”tasting” began, otherwise, the Hello Kitty bandaids would have needed to come out again.

There's fruit, so it's *healthy*
Since I was tripling the recipe, I used three bottles of white wine (pinot grigio, per AG’s original recipe).  It was actually more like 3 bottles, minus a glass.  Well, because you know, I had to taste the wine to ensure it was delicious.

Pro tip: "On Sale" wine will make it taste better
And where is where things started to go south.  I had nearly full bottle of Absolut Citrus, but I couldn’t find my measuring cup (I only have one, and it’s usually used as an emergency soup bowl or coffee mug).  So, to err on the side of caution, I poured the entire thing in.  There’s one thing I’ve learned in college - you can never go wrong with too much vodka, right?

I remembered that I had some peach nectar left over from NYE (I love bellinis)…and since it was in the fridge the entire time, it was probably still good, right?  But once I pulled out the box, I realized, there was only about a shot of nectar left.  That clearly wouldn’t make this sweet enough.  So I pulled out the rest of my bottle of Ice Wine Slushie mix, which is basically concentrated ice wine, and added that into the pitcher.  It’s deliciously sweet AND had the added benefit of more alcohol.  Because, clearly, that’s what this sangria needs.  More alcohol.

In case you haven’t gotten the sense of where this was going…nope, I didn’t have any ginger ale either.  But fortunately, I have a fridge full of champagne.  Hey, both are bubbly, effervescent and delicious.  It’s practically the same thing, right?  So I popped open a bottle…and again, because I couldn’t find my measuring cup…the entire bottle went in.  You know, just to be sure I got enough.

This is only with the 3 bottles of pinot...sooo much sangriaaaaaa!
 Quick stir, and VOILA!  Sweatshop Sangria!

Sweatshop Sangria Recipe:
  • 4 - 5 ripe peaches, cut into small chunks.  Use 6 peaches, of you plan on noshing while cutting.
  • 1 big plastic box of strawberries, hulled and cut into chunks/slices. Try not to eat more than half of the strawberries while cutting.
  • 3 bottles of Pinot Grigio…be sure to find the brand that’s on sale – it’ll taste better.  Trust.
  • 1 bottle of citron vodka (or whatever you have handy)
  • 1 shot of peach nectar…or whatever juice you have left in your fridge. Totally skip this ingredient if you don’t…it’s not that crucial
  • ½ bottle of ice wine or ice wine slushie…if you can’t find ice wine, I think Riesling would work too…the key is not to overthink this
  • 1 bottle of cheap champagne- if it’s more than $10 for the bottle, you’re grossly overpaying for champagne

  1. Cut up fruit and throw in a large pitcher.  It’s key to do this step first, so you don’t hurt yourself once you start “sampling” the booze
  2.  Pour in the wines, vodkas, juice, etc.
  3.  Save the champagne for right before serving, so you don’t lose the fizzy
  4.  Stir
  5. Pour into sippy cups so that when it knocks you on your butt, you don’t spill it over your brother’s new hardwood floors.
Sippy cups FTW!

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